Salvage Union: Aspirate Part Seven

"Ohhhhh my god you're being so dense, just listen to me, okay? So Thomas and Aaron were dating this guy, Marrow, and were like bringing him into the polycule, right? So they've got him over for dinner, they're roasting lizard, you know how they do, and they're like "so which settlement do you live in?" and Marrow's like "oh I live out in Greenfield". And Louise is like "oh I heard Greenfield is kind of a shithole from the beanstalk runoff contaminating the ground after it fell" and, like. Okay. We don't have time to unpack, like, her approaching them with that, like fuck Louise sometimes for real, yeah? But then Marrow looks at her and is like "oh the beanstalk never fell, that was a psyop".

Right?

So like congrats, that's what dinner's all about now. Thomas and Aaron brought in a fucking Fall Truther. And like they're not even cute but y'know, not my type. But also like whaaaaat the fuck, guys? Like it takes a certain level of out-of-touch to sincerely hold that as a belief, right? And, like, I don't want to jump on Thomas and Aaron and, like, talk shit about them. Everyone already is. But like come on guys! The sex can't be that good!

Oh, like, how it fell? Tripartite collision in low-orbit due to, like, overlapping orbital schedules for satellites being overlooked, I think? It's really noticeable in the wounds around the points of severance and the directions the pieces landed in. It's like really cool if you're into it but it also really sucks y'know?"

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